I get it : his head’s squished!
I recently had another obstetrician appointment following my scan at the Women’s & Children’s. This day, he was running a little late, so I was seated in the waiting room with a few other Mum’s and their children. I was unfortunately reminded (once again) that people are insensitive, inconsiderate and downright mean! The parents started doting over each other’s children (and when I say doting, I mean comparing), when one Mum blatantly said to another Mum ‘your boy can’t be 3, he’s so tiny and looks like a 1 year old’. I was absolutely flabbergasted – I actually can picture myself now sitting there wide eyed with my mouth gaping open! Did she just say this out loud? I honestly don’t know what makes people think these sort of comments are ok! I bit my lip and offered the other Mum a comforting smile, hoping she could read my sympathetic vibes which were screaming a big loud ‘eff you’ to the other gloating Mum sitting there with her 2 perfect sun-shining-out-of-their-ass daughters.
As you can see, I feel strongly about narrow-mindedness. People need to start thinking before they speak. I now understand why I have been ‘warned’ off mothers’ groups from other people – we are all constantly judging and comparing to make ourselves feel better. It is so disheartening to think that a network of people who are brought together to help each other can so easily attack each other. It was obvious this poor Mum was already self-conscious when she initially said ‘he’s 3, but he’s small’ and appeared uncomfortable and withdrawn in a room full of people. Yes, this boy may have been underdeveloped, but I’m sure this Mum hears that enough and faces constant judgement – she does not need to be reminded by a stranger.
Only minutes later, I was called in to see my obstetrician. After the initial formalities, he did a quick scan of Baby Purls and the first thing he said was ‘his head’s squished’. Wow, is this a day for unnecessary and unashamed comments or what!? I know…this isn’t news to me and I am completely aware of our boys limited space, so it shouldn’t really annoy me to hear, right? But it does. Every time I get a scan I am reminded of this. Maybe my obstetrician assumes that by now I have adapted to this information – I mean, it is the truth! But what ever happened to a little sensitivity? I just smiled and nodded and once again felt a pang of compassion for the poor lady in the waiting room who was suddenly very comparable to me…we are both tough as shit!
For those interested in the latest from my obstetrician appointment: I will now be having 4 weekly growth scans until bubs is here. From what I can tell, they are monitoring his measurements closely and these scans will ensure he has enough room and let us know if/when we need to intervene. My next scan will be at Mt Barker (uh-oh!) in 2 weeks, and the following will be back at Women’s and Children’s Hospital at 32 weeks. In the meantime, I also have my glucose tolerance test to rule out gestational diabetes. The little dude is full of movement and continues to reassure me that he is ok, which is all the reminding I need!